Exhausted After the Holidays? This January Practice Will Help with Next Year
A January Journaling Practice for Holiday Planning
OH hey…. It's January. How do you feel? Energized for the year? Drained and exhausted?
Holidays can be amazing and magical, but sometimes when you put it all together, all that magic and all that out-of-rhythm living can just. be. too. much.
You can easily end up drained and resenting what you first hoped would be a fun and exciting occasion.
If you're ready to feel more ease next January, I've got you. Today, I'm guiding you through a short reflective journaling practice to help align next year's holiday season more closely with your values.
If you're thinking, "Hey! I really nailed it this year! Everything was simplified, stress-free, and magical!" then kudos to you. Stop reading here, tell us the secrets to your success, and come write a how-to blog for me this fall. But if you think there are things between October (let's be real—the holidays start with Halloween for parents) and January that could use a tweak, stick with me.
Recognizing Holiday Burnout
Personally, I don't think of the holidays as being especially high-stress or over-the-top at our house, but then I notice little things in mid-December that tell me my brain is on overload and my resources are dwindling: forgetting to bring part of my lunch to work, accidentally leaving the garage door open, or waking up without feeling fully refreshed.
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Do you know the small signs your system is over-extended?
Why Review the Holidays in January?
But Faith, I just want to leave any holiday stress behind me, not think about it, and step into my aspirational New Year's resolutions. I don't want to rehash the last three months….
So why should we do this in January? Because the feelings are FRESH.
This is the time to review. By the time you're planning next year's holidays in 9-10 months, you'll have forgotten this totally overcooked feeling you have now. Let's review while the emotions (and motivation) are still strong.
Your Holiday Reflection Practice
Grab your calendar and your journal and let's begin. If you're listening, see if you can mentally review, but I encourage to take out your calendar because our brains can be SO biased and aspirational, and our calendars often create a more accurate record of our day-to-day.
Step 1: Capture Your Overall Feelings
First, write down any big, overarching feelings you have about the holidays right now or emotions you remember feeling in the moment. If you have children in school or childcare, include Halloween through the end of winter school break for all these exercises.
Imagine these as the brush stroke outlines or even the photo filter laying over the events. And just because it's always worth saying: any feeling here is just fine. No judgment. Resentment? Joy? Loneliness? We know this feeling isn't all of you. It's just one moment, one piece.
Step 2: List Your Major Activities
Next, pull out your calendar and a journal or spare piece of paper. Take a look at your calendar from mid-October to December 31st (or when your kids go back to school after winter break) and make a list of major activities in your journal or on a piece of paper. Include social, work, and family events: Friendsgivings, recitals, family gatherings, gifting, work parties, and even big deadlines.
Check in with yourself for each activity:
How did you feel while planning for that activity?
How did you feel doing that activity?
How did you feel after that activity?
Step 3: Sort Your "Hell Yes" and "Hell No" Lists
Get extreme with me for a moment. Put every holiday-related activity into a “hell yes” or “hell no” list. hell-yes: I love it all day, would hate to miss it, no matter how much effort it takes!" or "hell-no: I never need to do that again!"
I'm not going to make sure you NEVER do your "hell-nos," but I do want to be sure you get to really enjoy your "hell-yes" events!
Step 4: Set Your Intention for Next Year
Now think about how you want to feel next year over the holidays.
Write these feelings down somewhere you can find them again because they're going to be your guiding light. Write down your intentions and ideas for next year. Which activities bring that feeling to life? More social time? More introversion?
Finding Balance in Holiday Traditions
Sometimes we want to keep our holiday activities exactly as they are even if they feel overwhelming, and instead of cutting anything out, we need to add in more nurturing time to keep ourselves full. Or maybe there are traditions that your kids (or parents) absolutely love that you hate. Perhaps there's something you enjoy giving back to the community at this time of year, but it's also very draining.
We can respect these as important traditions AND we can also take care of ourselves and our own energy.
Just to clarify here: of course at Mountain Mama Massage we're happy to see you for massage in December to help keep you going! We LOVE to support our clients through seasons of stress with bodywork and a spacious nervous system reset. But I'm also talking about lowering your day-to-day overwhelm during a busy season.
Maybe the way you take care of yourself is a massage. Or maybe it's having a go-to holiday outfit, simplifying your recipes and mealtime (peanut butter sandwiches can be dinner!), carving out 10 minutes each day for practicing mindfulness, reading a novel, taking a daily walk, or any activity that helps you slow down.
Real-Life Example: Making the Holidays Work for You
As an example to get you inspired for shifting your holidays to work for you: one of my friends with young kids celebrates Christmas, and she noticed that every year she and her husband were up late after the big family Christmas Eve dinner finishing special last-minute present setups until late in the night. Then for Christmas Day both parents were totally exhausted and unable to be present with their kids.
So she made a change. Now the big family dinner is December 23rd. They eat pre-made lasagna and snuggle watching movies at home for Christmas Eve (with normal bedtime and plenty of time for adults to sprinkle Christmas magic after the kids go to bed).
What's great is that this was the perfect shift for her current season of life. Maybe in the future when gifts are smaller and easier to put together, it shifts again!
Step 5: Make Your Lists for Next Year
In your journal, make these three lists:
Things you're excited to include in your holidays next year
Things you hope not to do next year
Things you want to do to take care of yourself through the harder parts of the holidays
Setting Yourself Up for Success
If you know you're someone who forgets these new priorities partway through the year, I've got two ideas for you:
First, add a calendar reminder in September to re-read this part of your journal.
Second, you can use a site like FutureMe where you can write an email to yourself and schedule it to send in a few months, or use your email's built-in feature to write an email with a future send date. I like FutureMe because I don't see the email again until it arrives in my inbox.
Step 6: Communicate Your New Plan
Our last step here is communication. Once you have a real plan in place, see if there's anyone you need to communicate with around your new plan. Do you need to let your kids know ahead of time that something is changing? Do you want to let the neighbors know you're no longer hosting the holiday block party and someone else is welcome to step in?
Make a plan now for sharing those updates with family. Clarity is kindness. It's not your job to manage anyone else's feelings about the holidays.
And honestly, if everyone is feeling stuck in an old routine, try travel—even a little road trip can get everyone out of their "must-have" holiday routine and open to something new. When my grandfather passed away many years ago, we knew the first Christmas without him would be hard. We made a huge change from our always-home-for-Christmas traditions and took a big trip over the holidays with my grandmother and another multi-generational family. It kicked off a new tradition of spending holidays together that has been such a fun gift!
Your Holiday Review Recap
Let's recap your holiday review process:
You started by checking in with the broad brush strokes of how you felt about this holiday season
You noted anything you want to keep the same and a few things that aren't working so well—your "hell-yes" and "hell-no" lists
You set the intention for how you want to feel next year
You made a list of what you hope to include and remove from next year
You made an outline of how you'll take care of your own needs through the holidays
You created a communication plan for sharing changes with others
Moving Forward with Intention
As we get into holiday planning and we feel family (or internal!) pressure to make the holiday amazing, we often forget how overwhelmed we can feel when everything adds up. We end up just doing all the holiday-must-dos without as much joy instead of what we set our intentions to fully enjoy.
Next year, instead of automatically saying YES or NO to every event invitation or hosting opportunity, you're going to pause, read the invitation, and ask: Does this get me closer to or further from the feeling I'm cultivating?
And remember, we can always review again next year and make a different decision next time.
Ready to prioritize rest and self-care this year?
Book a massage at Mountain Mama Massage to support yourself through every season.
